A h i m s a

Ahimsa is the first of the Yamas (do’s) and the meaning of the word is translated into non-violence. 

To me yoga is the journey from the mind into the body or others might say to the heart. It’s been a journey of thinking less and experiencing more. It’s been a go to in all aspects of my life, and the world of yoga is so vast. In the beginning it was a scary world to enter, trust me, the ego really pulled all the tricks it knew to avoid entering this unknown world filled with possibility. Almost two years ago I started my first yoga teacher training, and my world was turned up side down. 

This time around it has given me great confidence in myself. I am now ready to practice unconditional love, understanding and compassion, not only towards others but to myself. Everything start with thyself. 

Two years ago when I started to grasp the fact that we are the creators of our own reality, I was filled with confusion.  

As I looked closer at myself and the life I believed I had, I was able to be loving in what I found painful to see. Instead of being judgmental I was compassionate. I listened to myself, I held myself I started to love myself. 

Today, Ahimsa, is a reminder of being kind towards yourself so that you can spread that loving energy out into the world. 

I found a quote when I googled Ahimsa, and it really stood out to me.  ”Peace in oneself, peace in the world”. 


For the past couple of days I’ve been putting a lot of focus into this topic, and through out the rest of the month this will be my theme.

As I spend more time with this I will share more of my experience and thoughts.

Day 13 (28 day cleanse)

I have been struggling these past couple of days, and lots of emotions have been brought up to the surface. I have been feeling feelings of failure and been somewhat critical towards myself because I haven’t been able to stick to the diet 100%. But I remind myself that each day comes with the opportunity to start again.  

Even though I feel this way at times I also see the upside of it. It shows me where I have to heal and therefore I can bring my attention to these parts of me. I can shed light upon the parts that I have been keeping in the dark for so long. 

This cleanse have allowed me to face myself in honesty once again. Seeing where I stand now, and I am now reclaiming my power. 

Today I meditated for the first time in a while, and it came to my attention that I have been chasing something that I don’t really feel good in. I noticed how my thoughts over and over again came back to one thing. And this thing was social media. I know that I want to share my journey, but I also want to be present during it. So the main goal isn’t to share it, but to experience it, and I feel like I lost that focus. I focused so much on sharing things on Instagram and then I started feeling anxious, because I didn’t feel like I was being true to myself. 

Social media can be addictive, and I got so caught up in it that I forgot to give myself love during these challenging times.  

Today during meditation it appeared to me that I am now heading a different direction then what I aimed for. So I take this time to recollect myself and my focus. Once again taking a couple of steps back.  



Turning my focus inwards have allowed me to ground myself in my experience. The feeling of digging deeper and deeper now excites me rather than frightens me. Because in the beginning it was hard to even face myself. The most important thing to me, is to trust in the higher power. Trusting my journey. 




So where do start?

Yea, life has been hectic after Christmas and all of that noise, even though I find it lovely to spend time with loved ones, I also value my alone time a whole lot.

Spending time with people sometimes have me end up outside of myself. I get caught up and slowly drift from myself. I forget to fill my cup, and soon I would be drained. Then I become a snail in its shell. I turn inwards to find myself again. I go into my cocoon to shower myself with love, and now I recover in no time.

I am learning to hear my own needs while around others and taking the space I need. This year I open up to receiving the courage and confidence to be me, always, no matter what. I am learning to feel worthy, because I know I am worthy. I deserve, what ever my heart desires.

It's happening

So I am officially 11 days over due, and I am finally having contractions! Yaaay.


On Monday I went to see my midwife and due to leakage I was sent to the hospital to examine if the water had broke. But it was a false alarm, apparently it was just discharge in a very watery form, which is common before labor starts. 


I was patiently waiting for labor to kick in, but nothing was happening. Yesterday I noticed a change in the color of the discharge. It went from this see through watery liquid to a pinkish color and a bit thicker in the texture. This is a sign that the cervix is ripening, and it wasn't long until I started having contractions. 


Ive been up all night, clocking contractions. Since two am they have been consistent, 10 minutes apart. Then it was a while when they were about 20 minutes apart around 7am this morning. Now I am having two contractions in 7 minutes and the clock is 1:40pm. I'm gonna continue clocking for a while and then head in to the hospital.  


I am so excited. This is it, we are finally meeting our baby girl! 

Pregnancy; 6 days overdue


I am feeling a bit stressed. Phone calls are coming in, people are curious asking if she arrived. I feel blessed to have people care about us and our baby girl, but I am also a bit frustrated over the situation. I am trying to relax and not get to worked up, but I just can't wait to meet my baby.  

I am seriously thinking about going hiding underneath a rock somewhere and not come out to show my face until this little one has decided to enter this world. 

But I guess I'm being a bit dramatic. Instead I'll kick my feet up, have some good food and watch movies.  

Tomorrow I am going to see the midwife, hopefully that will bring me some peace.  

Vessel of God

So here I am, 37 weeks pregnant looking back at my pregnancy journey. So much have happened, mentally, emotionally, spiritually and of course physically.  

When I first found out that I was pregnant I had mixed emotions, and a million thoughts ran through my mind. I doubted my self and was frighten of motherhood. But deep inside I knew I wanted to keep the baby. I have done abortion before and I also had a miscarriage, so deep inside I knew that this was a blessing. But of course I asked myself if this was the right time. But then again who am I to say when's the right time. 

Once we decided that we were going to keep the baby I knew change was needed, and I am so proud of how we have grown during this experience.  

Knowing that my body now was a home for a growing individual I also had to think about what I was feeding my body. Knowing that the little person inside would be effected by my conditions made me more aware of my thoughts, feelings and habits. I was became even more aware of my lifestyle.  

In the beginning I was somewhat low in energy but still didn't experience any negative symptoms of pregnancy such as morning sickness or headaches. Due to my diet I didn't really get the nutrition that I needed and I was craving candy and fat foods. It came to a point where I could eat burgers and pizza several days in a row.  

Finally I started rethinking and questioning the foods I was craving, and started to eat "healthier" until I turned completely vegan. Once I turned vegan my energy was on top and my skin was clearing up from all the eczema that I have suffered from since a child. I have never felt better.  

I am still processing the fact that I have a baby growing inside. Feeling her move inside of me, it's like time stops and I am completely mesmerized.  

It's hard to explain what being pregnant does to you, but I feel like a whole new person. I feel holy, like a vessel of god, bringing an amazing piece of art into the world. 

Going vegan

I have been so terrible at blog posts lately, but hey, something it be like that. I don't know if I have been writing about going vegan here, but if I have you just have to deal with another post. I know that this one isn't the last one neither.  

So, more than a month ago me and my man decided to go vegan. We had slowly transitioned into becoming vegetarians but after seeing what the health, we decided to cut out all animal products from our diet.  

In the beginning I felt hungry all the time, and got cravings. Being that I am pregnant I first thought it was pregnancy cravings, but after speaking to my two soul sister they confirmed to me that this was completely normal and that I wasn't alone in feeling hungry.  

I can't lie, I have cheated a couple of times, and had some pizza. But honestly I was so disappointed each time since I didn't really feel satisfied. I just how heavy my body got and my skin did not like this as all! 

There are so many other things that have been occurring to me after changing my diet and I will actually take time to share more with you. It's just that I have been preparing for the baby to arrive and have a hard time focusing on anything else. So please be patient with me.  



Update time (pregnancy)

Ok, so I have been dragging my feet when it comes to updating my blog. One reason is because I am so caught up in this pregnancy and I really been enjoying just spending time with my man connecting with our little princess. Due to the pregnancy my priorities have shifted and honestly I've been to tired to post things here also due to the fact that I haven't really thought about what I want to share. Now I am feeling more centered and rooted, which makes it easier to express myself. 

I am currently in week 28, or I just entered week 28 (27+0). This is the last week of the second trimester, and it's only 90 days left till due date. Gaaaah, time flies. 

I have had a pretty good pregnancy so far, with little to no pain or other symptoms like headache or nausea. I feel so lucky. I am now starting to feel heavier and have actually gained 20kg, even though it is not visible, I am curious how much more I will gain, knowing that I am entering the trimester where the stomach grows rapidly.  

I promise I will be better at updating the blog, hopefully I can do a weekly update from now on.