Moment of truth

It seems as if the latest post I've been posting have magically disappeared, but I guess it was meant to be that way.  

So good people, the moment of truth has finally arrived.  

To be honest I feel alone. I do have my amazing man that is so sweet and supportive, but when it comes to friends I honestly don't really feel I have many.  

It's always been hard for me to have female friends and even harder to have genuine male friends. For so long I felt like a lonely wolf, and at times I still do. 

I don't have a problem spending time with myself, I actually enjoy it! I just find myself socially awkward and often misjudged in company of others. 

Maybe I am crazy to say this, but I have to be honest with how I feel... at times it's as if the friends I have don't always like me... and sometimes even envy me. It's like people tend to feel the need of competing. 

Jealousy is a tricky thing... and I have a hard time believing that people do it on purpose. So I can't think bad of them for being jealous.  

I strongly believe that friendship and companionship should be all about lifting each other up, but it's not often I see that happening in our generation. Sadly there is so much underneath the surface people rather hide and deny than to face and deal with...

When ever things go well for the people around me or even people I don't know, I am filled with joy! And I have learned read comparing oneself with others with only lead to disappointment.  

I've learned to be grateful for what life offers me, instead of wishing for what life has offered others.